Monday, July 18, 2005


Anybody see this? Now, the whole world seems to be going nuts over this guy who jumped the Great Wall Of China on his skateboard. Am I the only one who wonders what the fuck the big deal is? He built these big ramps going right up to each side of the wall, and made it across the 61-foot gap. Ok, cool. BUT, it's not like he jumped the Grand Canyon or anything. He may have been some hundred or so feet off the ground, but when he was in the air he was above the wall, which was only like 20 feet under him. So if he goes skidding off the end of the ramp, he's not going to fall to his death. He's going to sprain his ankle or bruise his leg like any other skating crash. Whoop-di-doo. And the ramp looks to be about 300 feet wide so there's no chance he'll skid off the side into the real height drop. These kind of stupid stunts have always annoyed me. It's like when they light stuff on fire for motorcycle jumps, ala Evel Knievel, when in fact the fire makes it no more dangerous than any other jump of that distance. He's always got on a fire-proof jumpsuit and there are guys with extinguishers on every side. Oooooh, walk on the wild side of fire safety. What's next, guys bragging about bowling a 300 when they use the kiddy bumpers during the game? Color me unimpressed.

I'm off to Ireland for the week. I'll be ranting at you when I get back. Peace.

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

FOX Holes

What the fuck is with these people? For those of you that don't watch FOX News, have you heard some of the shit that was said on Murdoch's little propaganda machine after the London bombing? Well, get a load of this shit, courtesy of our friends at Media Matters.

First, there's this dick Brian Kilmead suggesting that this was a good thing to happen. According to him, we can now put global warming on the coal-fired back burner, along with African aid, and just stick to terrorism like we should have been all along.

So everyone knows that the day before the bombing London was awarded the 2012 Olympics. This is what FOX host John Gibson said then:

By the way, just wanted to tell you people, we missed -- the International Olympic Committee missed a golden opportunity today. If they had picked France, if they had picked France instead of London, to hold the Olympics, it would have been the one time we could look forward to where we didn't worry about terrorism. They'd blow up Paris, and who cares?

And then he said this after the attacks:

The bombings in London: This is why I thought the Brits should let the French have the Olympics -- let somebody else be worried about guys with backpack bombs for a while.

Where to begin on this guy? First, he speaks as though the awarding of the Olympics is somehow the reason for this bombing. So a big coordinated terrorist attack was planned and carried out in less than a day? Riiiight. And this whole French hating thing is just so odd. What I find the funniest about the whole thing is that Americans basically hate the French for the same reasons people hate Americans. A rude, angry, fuck-you attitude and they are completely impatient with people who come to their country and don't know their language. And we bash them for not going along with their war. Gibson, and other right-wing nutjobs, talk like we have some sort of kinship with the British and slam the French for being against our war. What none of them seem to remember is that the British people are against the war as much as the French. It's just that Tony Blair doesn't care what his people want, he is only concerned with pleasing his master Darth W. Sidious. Londoners will still be against the war and Tony Blair's approval ratings will drop back to the toilet after about six months. But for some reason, FOX thinks the British people are their comrades in the "War On Terror" (don't even get me started on that phrase). And holy shit, what kind of "journalist" comes out and says it would be ok if this city or that city got bombed? It might qualify as the worst thing said on FOX News, except that our old friend Brit Hume was working that day too.

Hume, FOX's Washington bureau managing editor, is the ass-hole who, early in the war in Iraq, compared the number of deaths of American soldiers in Iraq to California's murder rate and declared that the troops were safer in Iraq than they would be in The Golden State. So he's a big prick. But he topped himself this time. This guy is on the air hours after the bombing in London, and he says what his "first thought" was when he heard about the attacks:

I mean, my first thought when I heard -- just on a personal basis, when I heard there had been this attack and I saw the futures this morning, which were really in the tank, I thought, "Hmmm, time to buy."

Seriously, that's what he said. Fucking "time to buy" right after finding out that a bunch of people are probably dead. The man is scum. Can you imagine if this guy had been around reporting on the end of the Holocaust in WWII? "Boy, when I first heard about Auschwitz I sure wished I had invested in an industrial oven company before the war"

I hope he gets beat up by a Brit. Better yet, a Frenchman who lives in London. That'd be sweet.

Thursday, July 07, 2005

Theirs vs. Ours

I have been following all of the developments today in the London Underground attack, and there are a couple of things that struck me.

I have certainly had my problems with Tony Blair the last few years (mostly for being Bush's bitch), but he does have one big plus over our moron. Read this statement he made right after the attacks today and see if you can point out the big difference between this and the dumb Texan's first statement after the World Trade Center attacks:

I'm just going to make a short statement to you on the terrible events that have happened in London earlier today. And I hope you understand that at the present time we're still trying to establish what has happened. There's a limit to what information I can give you. And I'll simply try and tell you the information as best I can at the moment.

It's reasonably clear there have been a series of terrorist attacks in London. There are, obviously, casualties, both people that have died and people seriously injured. And our thoughts and prayers, of course, are with the victims and their families.

It's my intention to leave the G-8 within the next couple of hours and go down to London and get a report face to face with the police and the emergency services and the ministers that have been dealing with this, and then to return later this evening.

It is the will of all the leaders at the G-8, however, that the meeting should continue in my absence, that we should continue to discuss the issues that we were going to discuss and reach the conclusions which we were going to reach.

Each of the countries around that table has some experience of the effects of terrorism. And all the leaders, as they will indicate a little bit later, share our complete resolution to defeat this terrorism.

It's particularly barbaric that this has happened on a day when people are meeting to try to help the problems of poverty in Africa and the long-term problems of climate change in the environment.

Just as it is reasonably clear that this is a terrorist attack, or a series of terrorist attacks, it's also reasonably clear that it is designed and aimed to coincide with the opening of the G-8.

There will be time to talk later about this.

It's important, however, that those engaged in terrorism realize that our determination to defend our values and our way of life is greater than their determination to cause death and destruction to innocent people in a desire to impose extremism on the world.

Anyone? That's right, nowhere in there does he tell everyone to go shopping. Kudos to Tony Blair for not being a complete, disconnected-from-reality, idiot.

And here is a little of our dumbfuck's first statement today:

On the one hand, we got people here who are working to alleviate poverty and to help rid the world of the pandemic of AIDS and that are working on ways to have a clean environment. And on the other hand, you've got people killing innocent people. And the contrast couldn't be clearer between the intentions and the hearts of those of us who care deeply about human rights and human liberty, and those who kill, those who've got such evil in their heart that they will take the lives of innocent folks.

Yes Mr. President we do have people at that meeting who are trying to accomplish those things. Unfortunately, you're there too, putting up roadblocks every step of the way. You strip money away from real sex-ed programs and veto the Kyoto agreement on global warming, and now you try to lump yourself in as one of the people trying to stop the AIDS pandemic and save the environment?

What an ass hole.

And for the love of god would you please stop calling everyone "folk"? It may have helped you win the votes of Ma & Pa Kettle in Alabama, but you're embarrassing the rest of us on the world stage.

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Scroll Down

As you have probably been able to tell the last couple of weeks, my blog seems to have a slight technical problem. For some unknown reason there is a huge gap between the title of the most recent entry and the post itself, that makes it seem on first glance to be blank. The fine folks at have replied to my email that there is a bug they are working on and hope to get it taken care of soon. It seems to be taking longer than I hoped, but how can I complain about a service I get for free? In the meantime, just remember to scroll down past my links to see the newest rant from me. Or not. Do whatever the fuck you want, I'm not the boss of you.

The Pollutinator

This last Sunday The Independent newspaper of London ran an op-ed by Arnold Schwarzenegger about global warming. I'm sure you've heard about it, as it has been getting a decent amount of press. So the Republican governor of California disagrees with the leader of his party and believes that global warming is: a) real, and b) caused by humans. Here is a little bit of what he said, courtesy of the L.A. times. (The Independent wanted a whole British Pound for the original article and I just couldn't justify spending that much money on an piece written by a talking monkey):

"The debate is over. We know the science. We see the threat posed by changes in our climate," Schwarzenegger wrote. "And we know the time for action is now.

"I ask citizens and governments everywhere to do their part by conserving energy, reducing the use of fossil fuels, reducing waste and taking every opportunity to work together for a cleaner, healthier tomorrow."

and this:

"Many people have falsely assumed that you have to choose between protecting the environment and protecting the economy," he wrote. "Nothing could be further from the truth. In California we will do both."

OK, so far so good. We need politicians who stand up for the environment. Global warming is a very real problem and it needs to be addressed. And we damn well know this current administration is going to do dick about it. But when looking for a leader on this issue should we really turn to this guy?:

So the guy with the fucking Hummer cares about our air quality? I've got one suggestion for the first step he could take: QUIT DRIVING THE HUMMER!

Seriously, this is one of the things that pisses me off about my fellow Americans. They claim to care about the environment and think we should do something about it, as long as they aren't the ones who have to make any sacrifice or alter their lifestyle at all. How many times do you think Arnie has taken the train between his home in L.A. and his office in Sacremento? Or do you think he's been driving his 10 miles/gallon Hummer up there? I've never once read in the news about any Arnold sightings on the L.A. subway either.

The first thing Arnold did as Governor of California was cut dramatically the cost of car license plates, in effect giving people more incentive to drive. And he cares about global warming? I'll believe that when I see something in the news about his multi-billion dollar plan to expand L.A.'s public transportation system. Until then, all his talk is nothing but more hot air adding to the problem.

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

Funny Ha-Ha

Gary Trudeau is still one of the best satirists in the world...

Sunday's Doonesbury

Friday, July 01, 2005

Random Thoughts

Sandra Day O'Connor is stepping down . We are so very screwed. At least if it were Rehnquist we would just be replacing one right-wing nutjob with another. Now a moderate gets replaced by that nutjob instead.

Oh, and when Rehnquist does retire, here's a chilling thought: Chief Justice Scalia.

Kenny Rogers (the baseball player, not The Gambler) went loco on some poor cameraman just doing his job and shoved the guy and tried to bust up his camera. In the aftermath his idiot manager is saying things like "he's frustrated, that's not the Kenny Rogers I know". Oh bullshit. Let's please remember that all of these jocks in pro sports are the same assholes who dunked kids' heads in toilets and shoved them in lockers during high school. A bully is a bully.

Have you seen those BP commercials that try to paint them as some environmentally friendly oil company? Do you hate them as much as I do? Every time I have to see that stupid woman compare giving up your car to not having chocolate I want to scream. I just want to smack her so much. She's only shot from chest up in the ad. I'm guessing it's because her ass won't fit in the frame because of all the chocolate and driving too much.
And that one with the fucking Yuppie woman with her kids in the park going on and on how oil companies should have good air quality standards, even "better than the EPA standards" she says. What she probably isn't telling you is that she got to the park from her house five blocks away in her 12/mpg SUV that's just out of camera range. Typical American, always somebody else's job to make sure we have a clean environment.

Robert Novak. This asshole reveals the name of a CIA operative as political payback for her husband being critical of Bush, and other reporters are going to go to jail over it? Word in Washington is that he has already given the Feds the name of his "confidential" informant, to keep his ass out of jail. As Jon Stewart has said several times, what a douchebag.

I didn't think it was possible to hate Tom Cruise anymore than I already did. I was wrong.

I read a recent interview in the Boston Globe where Lindsay Lohan refers to a recent role as "empowering for girls". The Movie she's talking about? Herbie: Fully Loaded.